You Are NOT Your Job!

job

Why is it so depressing to lose one’s job?

Ok, admittedly, you just lost the income you have been living off and depending on for food and bill payments. (that sentence was indeed quite depressing)

But really..

Even when you are still eating quite well, sleeping in a comfortable bed and not facing prison for any major debts, being unemployed just seems to have its own personal, dark cloud of gloom.

The problem is, like most other unshakable irrational characteristics of societal living, your job forms a huge part of your identities.

We let jobs decide just how valuable we feel. We allow them to dictate our worth as a contributing member of society. On an attached thread, we allow our salaries to determine our worth.

This is a destructive thought process considering we have very little control over being hired, fired or demoted at any time.

Despite what you have been hardwired to believe, your worth is not determined by your job.

Don’t believe me?

Think of all the skills and talents you have that do not directly contribute to your current job description. The boss doesn’t know about your amazing TV trivia skills. Neither does he know that you have a knack for fashion and constantly get complimented on your great outfits. The fact that you can make a moist yummy chocolate cake from scratch has never come up in a performance assessment.

Think about it.

Go ahead and take a minute to write down all the things that you are really good at and that you actually enjoy doing. The things you would never list on a resume because recruiters don’t give two hoots about those kinds of skills.

In fact, create a “life resume” listing all your amazing experiences. Add personal experiences you are really proud of such as quit smoking, taking  a public speaking course , learning a language or performing a choreographed, dance routine in front of hundreds of people. (Such memories)

Be sure to add all your great qualities, unique skills, the things that your friends always call you for advice about. All these things are what make you, you. Not your job. It is said humans only use a small percentage of the brain.

Well, most jobs only require a very small percentage of your entire life skills, strengths and abilities.

Do not be defined by your job. That is not who you are. It is something that you do for a living. If you ever feel the desire to make a living doing something that you really love and that you’re good at, check your life resume as a reference for ideas.

Start seeing yourself for what you are really worth. Your value and worth lies in the things that you enjoy doing and that you are also good at. If you can find a skill on that list which can be monetized, pursue it.

Instead of being defined by your current situation, you can change your thinking from ‘I need a job’ to ‘I desire to build wealth‘ by pursuing something you are truly passionate about. This simple shift will open up a world of possibilities you never saw before.

You are worth so much more than your job.

The Purpose of Negative Emotions

emotions1

Negative or unwanted emotions are a part of our experience of being human and are unavoidable. In fact, they are very clear signs that we are emotionally healthy humans. We feel sad when something undesirable happens or guilty when we have caused someone else pain or harm. This is a healthy sign that we are capable of empathy; the one characteristic that differentiates us from psychopaths.

Negative emotions, although uncomfortable are healthy, natural occurrences. Like other emotions, they are not permanent. They do not exist to torment us forever. No matter how painful that breakup was and how convincing the present feeling is that the pain will never end. Emotions come and they go.

Negative energy on the other hand, occurs when we cling to negative emotions longer than we should. The unresolved feelings after a breakup can develop into depression, thoughts of self-harm or obsession. Unchecked jealousy and envy have been motivators in many homicide investigations. The key is to learn from the negative emotion then let it leave.

“You must let the pain visit. You must allow it to teach you. You must not allow it to overstay.”

The pain from negative emotions alert us to the things we find undesirable. This is a very useful tool in discovering authenticity and purpose. We tend to focus on the things that make us happy and excited when trying to discover passion and purpose. But the things that trigger our undesirable emotions are powerful clues to who we  truly are.

Among the various pathways to passion described in Creating a Wealthy Mindset, I mentioned revisiting childhood desires, dreams and role models. However, your childhood upsets and indignations point to the things that bother you; things you want to change. These are the causes that you will be willing to fight for; your purpose.

As a child, I was upset by seeing animals being mistreated. To my parents’ dismay, I took in strays as pets and always had cats hidden under my bed. I thought at one point I would be a veterinarian. It so happened, I had a passion for the ‘underdog’ so to speak. I was eventually led to uplift and motivate others to live fulfilling lives by overcoming their internal obstacles.

It took a few years and several attempts before I was able to clearly define that purpose. But each negative experience (and my over the top reaction to it) led me, inch by inch towards my authenticity and ‘calling’.

Your negative experiences and emotions are powerful indicators of the things that you were meant to do. They serve as a pathway to your deepest passions. It will not be a linear process and can be quite murky and confusing at the beginning but pay very close attention to the things that upset you. The causes that get you riled up, trigger your rage; that gets that fire in your belly.

These are the emotions that will push you to take action.

Anger is a great hint for figuring out the things that you are passionate about. If it triggers such powerful emotions in you, it might be worth pursuing.

Envy is a sign that you aspire to be somewhere that you haven’t reached yet; somewhere someone else has already reached. Guilt suggests an issue that needs to be resolved either by apology, corrective action or both.  If you feel like an underachiever, it simply means that you have great ambitions and your subconscious is nudging you towards attaining them. Every discomfort has its purpose.

Negative emotions are guides.

Observe them closely and follow them on your journey to greatness.

Losing The Fear Of Change

I didnt forgetwhere i camefrom. i justcan't stay there

The tiles were yellow and faded.

Aged and handled magazines covered the coffee table. As I sat in the doctor’s office of my hometown, I saw several familiar faces. People I had known forever but never quite got around to meeting.

It was my first week on the road as a Pharmaceutical Rep. As I patiently waited for the receptionist to signal for me to steal a few minutes with the doctor, I overheard a conversation between two patients.

“I didn’t know you still lived in this town”. A young man in construction boots and soiled clothes responded, “I was born here. Where else would I be? I’m not going anywhere.”

A very simple realization that many people never get, is that fact that…

You are not a tree!

You are not planted where you were born or to any destination or situation that you happen to land in. You always have a choice to move. As humans, growth and change are not only natural, they are inevitable.

If you choose to stay where you are because you are very happy there, then that’s great! But that is very different from the notion of staying in one place simply because you were born (not planted) there.

You have to no obligation to stay where you are. Travel and explore. Have adventures and discover other places and things that resonate with your desires; your authenticity.

You owe it to yourself to find out what you like and dislike outside the influences of your hometown folk.

Similarly, never stay in a career or a job simply beacause you made that choice when you were younger. Never be afraid to move and try other things. Never be afraid to admit, “This isn’t for me. Let me try something else”. Discover your passion, try a new hobby, start a side business.

See what else is out there.

I dare you to move.

You can start by ordering a copy of Creating a Wealthy Mindset. Start by removing the mental untruths that have prevented you from living the life of your dreams.

Discover financial freedom and pave your path to success.

 

From Pain To Purpose

He who has the power of turning all negative vibes in his path into positive energy has learned the meaning of life

When I went broke, I experienced severe emotional pain. In my mind, there was nothing more painful than not having a steady stream of income. It stole my independence and my freedom – two of the things I valued dearly.

I got angry

Felt helpless

I felt like a slave to whomever I allowed to offer assistance. It was not a good feeling. I felt lesser than, beneath those who were still taking care of ‘biz’ and handling their lives with their steady incomes.

I also promised myself that I would help anyone who ever found themselves in these circumstances, which formed the foundation of ‘Creating a Wealthy Mindset’.

It soon dawned on me that my identity (idea of who I was) was so closely tied to being financially independent that not being in that place (no matter how temporary) was messing with my self esteem and causing great pain.

What did I have to offer now?

Who was I?

I felt diminished.

The issue wasn’t a lack of money. I certainly wasn’t starving. I ate each day satisfactorily and slept each night in safety. But the very thing I had identified my values with, was stripped from me.

People will fight and claw and do anything to protect that which identifies them.

Whatever you get your value from, is what you will fight tooth and nail for.

Getting and having money is great but what are your values and how are they tied in to how you make money, how you invest that money and your general contribution to the betterment of the world.

In other words, why the hell should you be wealthy?

If you are comfortable where you are right now, smooching off some relative, barely making it by each month what motivation is there to change, to move from where you are?

You need to tap into your pain source

What is the most painful thing about where you are?

Do they feed you but complain about it or give you attitude as they throw food in your mouth?

Do you long for freedom from other people’s idea of living.

So, what identifies you? What are your values? How do you define yourself?

This is your pain.

Use it. Wield it.

Put all that frustrating energy into creating your own life. Design it just the way you want. Let your pain help you to remain uncomfortable until you are where you want to be.

Transform that energy

That pain you feel now is your potential energy. Like a stone being pulled back in a slingshot. That stone holds within it massive energy to buss someone’s head if released (lol), but it won’t do any damage until it’s released. The pulling back of the stone increases its potential energy (the farther back it’s pulled, the greater force it will have when released).

The greater your potential energy (your pain), the greater the force when you become released. So, increase that pain when you can. Use it as your motivation to keep planning, keep going.

This is not the end of your story, merely a dark chapter. That middle chapter of your amazing biography. No great book goes without having a dark scary chapter for the hero/ heroine to overcome.

Dare you to move…

Stephanie ♥